It’s another lovely fantastic hot sunny glorious day outside, it has been this nice every day since I’d been ill.

Sadistic weather.

I don’t feel so ill today, my throat is kinda a bit better, I managed to eat some real food last night (”numfar do the dance of joy!”) but it still fecking hurts. The first wave of spots are crusting over, they look oh so attractive as they’re now pussing up with white stuff before drying out. My scalp is the most painful, I could barely lie down the other night, and I keep forgetting about it and itching my head and then end up in uber pain cause I forgot it’s not just an itch but probably a sore, and I can’t brush my hair properly which is driving me nuts also.

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Awful, very exhausted and worn out. Work felt like the longest four hours of my life evar.

Just want to curl up somewhere and sleep. No energy to do all the things that need doing. Mother keeps behaving like I have the plague or something, eat this, drink that, do this, do that, go to the doctors YOU’RE GOING TO DIEEEE!!!11!1!1!!!!

Yeah.

Feel really displaced from friends at the moment, feels like I’ve barely seen any of them for ages now. But everyone is busy and have exciting lives I forget. Instead I’ll just look forward to new Peep Show tomorrow.

Cup of tea and hug please. Yip.

Why am I so tired even though I went to bed quite early for me?

What is the meaning of this?

Tea makes things immediately about 10% times better.

It’s Chinese New Year.

To you this means nothing, to me this means money in a red envelope and the prospect of eating duck. Cool.

It’s apparently the Year of the rat, which in fact doesn’t surprise me, I was born in the Year of the Rat and if my vibe is correct I should have a good year right? I had this funny feeling that this Year something big was going to happen, something was going to change and become better. I still believe it and I won’t give up on that vibe until it actually happens.

No motivation today. Apart from more reminders of why I shouldn’t stay where I am at the moment. Things need to change, need to aspire and reach out a little. Brain keeps ticking, despite a rubbish start to the day I found my brain in reasonable optimistic shape and I was thinking about ideas for photos and such. I like it when my brain is in that sort of mood, makes me feel warm and smiley.

Saying that, feel far too exhausted and worn out to give much effort/thought to photo projects at the min. Just want to curl up and watch stuff. Yada yada.

Come on I need to do something with myself. This is it, make or break, enough practice runs and getting wrong. I should have had enough trial and error by now yo have learnt how to at least go about things the right way now.

This has been the only good thing about today:

God bless pancake day as an excuse to clog my arteries with fat.

Had a bad start, woke up still feeling sleep deprived and then I went to work and the road I went into town with was closed off by police and I got diverted to the shit way into town that was always busy and so forth.

Then while waiting in the queue of traffic I get a call of work asking where I was…shit, I’d thought I started at 11.30, when in fact I started at 11. Shit shit shit!

Ah well I make it in and get on with it, had some random fun of being “trained” the rest of the stuff they forgot to cover officially (just random stuff that I kinda knew already) and got shown how to fetch new stock down to replace stock that had been sold.

I did end up going to see ps. I love you randomly too, but more bout that in it’s own post.

I’m also annoyed because I’ve seemingly ran out of time to do things I wanted to do like catch up on flickr, catch up on threesixtyfive and blog. Maybe I will blog tonight then do the flickr stuff tomorrow. I do have a day off and all.

I finally got my wage slip sorted out, I now know what it all means and feel less confused about the dates they’d sodding stuck on it. So all is well, kinda, except the transition between weekly pay to monthly is bloody painful, I’ve borked my nice budgeting and keeping afloat and I’m now fooked until pay day…17 days to go! Easy…

Not much else to say except *sigh*.

God I’m so tired.

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