Autopilot
Last night I dreamt I was at a Mexicolas gig and I was a photographer for them, at first the gig was meant to be small but I remember looking down the length of the room and there were shit loads of people! A couple of other mates were there too, and after the gig they served loads of chinese food 0_o
I’d been dreaming weirdly of late, lots of vivid dreams that lead me to doze the last hour or so in bed. Thankfully I don’t feel so wretched when I try to get up in the morning either any more, I wonder why that is? Maybe it has something to do with the time going back an hour? Who knows.
Today I went into town to return application forms and found myself at an agency and registered with them for office work. Was strange. It was one of those moments where I switched off for a bit and then the next time I clicked back I was thinking “What am I doing here?”
I think I surprised myself somewhat that I was actually being surprisingly monotone and proactive with the job hunt now. I’d switched off my sorrow and replaced it with anger and started just doing stuff without thinking about it too much. I think I just want the money, all I have clear set in my mind is to get the money to settle my debts, to save and to go visit K and then travel, this is all I have in my mind.
I’m just on autopilot..
“…fuck it…whatcha gonna do?”